Crying In Carolina......

......for sure I miss my friends and my beautiful family in Texas, but no these tears are tears not of sadness, but of a reaction to Klingon pollen and histimines like I haven't experienced since moving from Seadrift to Austin. Funny, moving from Austin to Houston, cured me completely. Go figure. Maybe the exhaust fumes killed the allergens there.
From day one out here, my eyes have been weeping and my sinuses boiling. I have so far, resisted the obvious over the counter poisons, and going to the doctor for him to get his hand deeper into my pockets than it is over my blood pressure and cholesterol.......

A nice hotel desk clerk who moonlights as a nutritionist, recommended I try some of the local honey, made from local pollen by local bees, as a possible source of relief. Two doses in my diet today and so far, so good. I am prepared as a "plan B", in the event the honeybees bomb, to sample the local corn next. Best delivery system I have come up with so far, is trying the local moonshine......
My friend the nutritionist suggested mixing it with the honey, should I resort to such a "cure". My old friend the Grey-Beard Loon seems to be in agreement as well, that the "shine" is at least worth a try, if not actually a damned good plan......
So if you see me with a Mason Jar full of water...........

Lima Time! A Happy Memory of a Good Man

As much as a lot of celebrities, sports stars, and persons of note pass, and many times it turns out that their death was a result of their inability to control or deal with their their fame and fortune, there are those other tragic stories of a truly decent, gifted person, with role model stuff. Talent, charisma, and a gift of being able to impart that way of appreciating life and living it to the fullest, to others. Jose Lima was such a person, and he died this morning.
He passed away this morning at his home in California. What a heartbreaking piece of news. My condolences to Jose's family and friends. As one who loves the sport of baseball, I can say that there are few who measure up to the caliber of person that Jose Lima embodied. A truly gifted athlete, he was so much more as a person. He was the light of the Astros team, and a person who loved his life and lived it to the fullest. In addition to a talented baseball pitcher, he was a great dancer, and a talented singer in his own salsa band.
I am a father, and the one "Lima Time" moment that I will forever remember, was at at game in the Astrodome. It was before the start of the game, and Jose and some of the young PR girls were tossing soft Astros promotional "baseballs" into the crowd. My oldest son was maybe four at the time, and he ran from our seats down to the rail by the Astros bullpen along the first base line in the outfield and disappeared into the crow lining the rail, as they were down to one last ball - in Jose's hand, to toss into the crowd. I watched him look into the crowd of fans and kids lined up with outstretched hands. Then I saw his face light up with the sweetest big Lima smile that was so typical of Jose, then he walked to the railing and disappeared behind the crowd standing there. A couple of seconds later my little beaming, grinning Stephen came running back to our seats a couple of rows up, holding the ball the Jose handed to him. As I sit here with a tear on my cheek, after hearing the tragic news, I can safely say that that smile as he locked gazes with my little boy, and the one that he put on my boy's face that day, is the way I will forever remember Jose Lima. I am eternally grateful for the one little thing Jose did and for the influence that it had on myself, and most surely on my son. A truly wonderful soul. Rest in peace, Jose.

On Your Feet or On Your Knees.........

This.....



Plus this.....

Equals......

Probably the best cobbler I have made to date.

Oh, and this......



I started to name this "wish in one hand and scratch with the other....."
Likely no more berry picking this year. has anyone seen my wire brush?

Take Me Out......at the ballgame

I and my girl have watched this, and she being a recent, but rabid baseball fan/convert by osmosis, was quite tickled by this one. My gut reaction when I saw the replay,(and after realizing it wasn't Japanese ball) was "cool, but likely against the rules" ........apparently not, at least in that league, as it technically is not addressed as "running out of the baseline", I don't think, anyway. I suspect there will be a base running altitude ceiling considered by rule makers at some point as a result of this one. This could in fact, revolutionize the approach major league scouts take to their jobs. You might see a few scouts taking in some high school and NCAA track and field events in the not too distant future. In defense of the runner taking flight as opposed to tunneling in at home, the catcher had every opportunity to slap a tag on him on his final approach before landing. The runner just got the drop on him.

This all makes me reflect back on one night at a Little League game I played in Port O'Connor back in about '62. I was playing catcher, for our team, my dad being the manager. I guess to really make this a clearer picture for you, I need to remind you all that at age 11-13, there is a rather wide range in the sizes of bayrat ballplayers. Some being runts, just barely pushing 90-100lbs and not yet tall enough to go on certain rides at the carnival, while some others are pushing six feet and 175-180lbs, sporting some chin whiskers and a birds nest in their full cup, and looking big enough to take the helm of a dump truck without anyone giving them a second glance.

That said, in this particular game, yours truly was the diminutive catcher, awaiting, ball clamped firmly in mitt, the runner bearing down on him trying to score from third. For those unschooled here(please, the rest of you experts, bear with me), I will toss in some rules of baseball. You see, a base runner may when running to first base, slide(not advised-adds time to the equation), turn and round the base, or just blast through the base, turning out of the baseline into foul territory, optimizing his speed, and generally the preferred method on a close play. At second and third, depending on the situation, generally, the runner will either keep running, go in standing, or slide to avoid a tag, the notable exception, being the old "hard" slide to break up a double play at second base, which occasionally, results in some questionable "slides", and less frequently, fisticuffs, over a less than legal "slide".........which brings us back to home plate, and the real subject of this story. You see, at home, they added one more method of reaching that final, run scoring pay station. That being the mano a mano, runaway train, collision at the dish, with the intention of this little rule they apparently stole from schoolboy dodge ball, being to allow the runner to by sheer impact and brute force, take his best shot at separating the catcher from the baseball clamped in his mitt, whereby he will if successful, have scored a run.........
Okay, we just hit 88mph again, and the flux capacitor has done its magic, and we are back in 1962.......little pilot the catcher, clutching the ball looking at one Dennis Raby, looking for all the world, like a prize brangus from hell, snorting fire, bearing down on me from third base, as I dug in and squeezed the ball tighter.

They tell me I hung on to the ball almost until I hit the backstop..........
Next thing I remember, was opening my eyes while making those croaking sounds one makes after having the wind knocked out of them, looking up at Rocky, Jackie, Donald, and I swear, Alfred Hitchcock, and Dale Evans, with Lassie licking me in the face.
In retrospect, I wish now that Dennis had high hurdled me, but probably so do a lot of other folks who get to hear this story every time they are watching a game on TV with me, and there is a collision at the plate...........

A Man of Many Hats.....well, one or two, and a few ball caps

What started as a comment on my wall on another blog site, then noted by my "lady" mentioned a couple of lines down, is to be the subject of this blog. Someone observed the hat that I wear in the profile photo I have posted on both blogs and inquired as to its origin, current fate, and any "comical" stories????? about it. So here dear girl, is the "story you recommended I make it into.

While my day to day attire normally includes a gimme, bubba ball cap from Costa Rica, or South Padre Bank, or my black, jalapeno print cap from Marble Falls Marine, I do indeed still wear my "Pat Hat" as my lady refers to it, quite proudly, on many occasions from dining in or out with friends, to the occasional Jackson Browne, David Gray, or Jimmy Buffett concert. When I am not wearing it, it becomes the headwear for a wooden bear carved from a tree with a chainsaw, that I purchased from a roadside vendor in Colorado years back, that sits in a display case full of various Gulf rig coral, antique mike nelson scuba gear I have retired, various collectible musical instruments, antique glass insulators I unscrewed from pole lines I dismantled with the death of the railroad communications system many years ago, and a host of books and atlases, and last but not least, the one eared teddy bear my folks bought for me before I was born, almost sixty years ago. No, I don't think I have ever written a piece on that hat, just as I have never written a piece on my favorite old purple and black ski parka, or my last cool pair of shades I bought, when I could still see without prescription spectacles. I have had a few compliments on it, when on the town, but this is the first time anyone was ever really focused on it as an "inquiring mind", looking for some in depth info on it....... It was a gift from a dear friend who on occasion, wears one similar to it, and bought it for me after he saw them on some old Portuguese guys on a European vacation, and deemed it something that he thought I must have. He is an old wordsmith, and retired newspaperman, who has likely forgotten more about story telling, old time printing, journalism and newspaperin' than most modern "journalists" will ever learn. "

Houston Sports Venue Naming Rights 101

This one is probably just a product of too much time on my hands, but I couldn't help but think that maybe our local sports venues first shots at licensing their stadiums as far as naming rights, left a little to be desired.......well, since after the Astrodome anyway. It's not exactly like the Astros had anything to do with the demise of Enron, in allowing their beautiful ballpark at Union Station to be renamed "Enron Field", but history speaks for itself.........

Now we have the Rockets' new home........The Toyota Center. That does seem a fitting name for a building housing a sports franchise that obviously is in serious need of a recall though, doesn't it? While "Come see the home team floor it at the Toyota Center" would have been a cool promo it does appear that that this year's cagers apparently had their accelerator stuck on "idle".

Looking Back At My Sunday.....

.....made biscuits, bacon, con huevos for the girl, the surfer kid and myself.....later, spent a bit too long enhancing my tinnitus, but the aforementioned surfer dude, benefited from a real world experience. One that will likely make him re-evaluate the thrill of some of his video games. For his first time, an hour or better on the firing line with a real Glock Model 19, and sandwiched between soccer moms, would be Rambos packing Mossberg cannons, a few suburbanites killing a chilly afternoon, and a couple of guys you just know will turn up on the evening news, was a bit of a sobering experience for my boy. Good news, is that handled the weapon with the safety and respect that he was taught to. Better news yet, for a dad, was that in departing the range, when queried about the experience, he said it wasn't as cool as he expected it would be. While his paintball and airsoft experience translated into a rather impressive display of accuracy and discipline with the 9mm, I think the reality of what firearms really sound like, and just what they are capable of doing or causing, finally won out over the sound from computer or TV speakers, and only having to use lightning fast fingers on a keyboard or X-Box controller. For all of the preaching I've done, nothing could have been more eye opening for my son, than seeing and feeling what he did today.

After all of that, Mr. pacifist pilot, found out that he could still put a pretty tight group around the noggin of a paper "bad guy". Hope I never have to do that. As I told the two of them, while it's handy to know how to handle a gun, don't look to this old boy to put backstrap on the menu.......I am much more content sacrificing by gigging, and gathering a mess of flounder, or tricking a slew of whiting, or specks into jumping from the surf into my skillet(and they are a helluva a lot easier to field dress and get to the dinner table than a 140 lb furry four legger that I had to at first look in the eye, then blast with a cannon. Please don't misunderstand me, I won't turn down venison steaks or sausage. Just don't look to me to bring them home........

Wrapped up the evening with my headphones and hanky, on YouTube, being mesmerized by Jim Dandy and Black Oak Arkansas, The Ozark Mountain Daredevils, Annie's Band(Heart), and the Guess Who.......oh, and visiting Edith Ann, The Loon, Sugar Magnolia, The Truth Ferret, and Fred Reed and Timothy McSweeney's motley stable of writers.......

Did You Have A Coonskin Cap?" , or get a "dear john" Letter......

Did you? I did. Before G.I. Joe, and waaaay before X-Box and G.T.A., when it was still cool to clothespin playing cards on our bikes so the spokes made them sound like we had a motorbike, or to play cowboys and Indians, or battle in the yard, with those drawing the short straw having to be the Japs and Germans, there was also some Texas pride going on, as Davy Crockett was on TV and the ballad of Davy Crockett, was on the radio. Fess Parker, the man who embodied that hero for us on TV as kids passed this week. I hope it didn't go without notice for many, as he was in real life, a good man, and a gentle giant as well.

In addition, a master singer/songwriter, Alex Chilton, who went largely unnoticed beyond penning and singing "The Letter", and "Soul Deep", as the founder of the Box Tops, also passed.

These passings may not mean much to a lot of people, but they were both part of the input that influences who I and probably a lot of other boomers are today. They will be missed.

A Beetlejuice Rerun.......

Okay, I have to admit that I am posting this at the request of my friend Edith Ann(and that's the truth),and after reading a similar article in today's Advocate. Actually, this originally appeared in the Advocate back in 2006, but I s'pose since I wrote it, it isn't technically plagiarism, right?

Breakfast With The Beetles
By pilot in A Pirate Aground In The City
January 27, 2006

Eewww factor high on this one......I caught a piece of a story on the radio about 4:30 this morning on the way to work, regarding the pretty colored fruit on the bottom of Yoplait Raspberry Yogurt, and ruby red grapefruit juice. It turns out that they don't come by those bright red hues quite so naturally, and need a bit of a boost in the pigmentation department to spiff 'em up and make them look all the more tasty, they do. Also turns out that the most effective and safe coloring agent for these products, comes from a little cactus eating female beetle from south of the border known as Dactylopius coccus.


By the way, they also use this dye in shampoo, candy, and many other products as well.
Credit the Aztecs and Mexican indigenous tribes for discovering this little bug, and the Spaniards for capitalizing on it.

Yes Birddog - I Snopes'd this one. Like I said - 8.5 eewww factor. Probably pegs the needle on the PETA (people eating tasty animals) meter too, considering it takes about 70,000 of these ladybugs to make a pound of dye.
I'd love to hammer on this one more, but it's time to head downstairs to the Greasy Spoon for a yogurt and some grapefruit juice.........

Read about your breakfast here:
http://www.snopes.com/food/ingredient/bugjuice.htm

What's Next - Transgendered History Month?

Caught an editorial in today's Victoria Advocate, that got my attention for a couple of reasons. It was regarding Womens' History Month", and by the time I saw it, it had one typically inappropriate comment on it by a local freak, P.M. Tasin. I fired one over his bow, and in turn, it was along with his comment, summarily removed. Mission accomplished! Anyway, I started this as another comment to the article, and after reading it, decided it was a stand alone rant, so here it is:

Well now, we just had black history month. Then here comes womens' history month. I have looked briefly at my calendar, and have yet to find mens' history month...I suppose in a year or two, they'll have a transgendered history month as well. Has anyone else considered that these events are about as useful as some of the B.S. throwdown holidays that the banks and government closes their offices for? The majority of these little fiestas are just self serving events with a heavy slant toward commercialism. For my money there is a subject taught in schools today that should cover just about all of those who want to think that their race, gender, or religion is special enough to have a holiday. It's called "history". It pretty much is all encompassing. I think a country's Independence Day, and some other notable accomplishments or tragic events as a society, would qualify as a holiday - like Cinco de Mayo, Quatro de Julio, and especially Texas Independence day. Remember how in the interest of not being excessive, they just lumped Washington's birthday and Lincoln's B-Day into one day? Well maybe they could do the same with all of the women's history month, black history month, gay history month, etc., and just narrow it all down to "Human Day", and keep the banks and Post Office open a little more. I'd babble on about this here, but now I need to run out before all of the womens' history month cards get snapped up at HEB and CVS.

Kinky for ...........

.......well, hell, for something, please? Honestly, the man just wants to make a difference in our lives, and we should elect him for something, and give him his shot. Just returned from a Kinky Friedman concert at a little club here in the city tonight. A little chilly night to be sure, with a few pretty flurries, but unfortunately for my boys, nothing to make tomorrow a "snow day"........
I go back a lot of years with the Kinkster. Back to the time when he paid his filing fee to run for President against Jimmy Carter, and when Carter was campaigning to lower the speed limit to 55, Kinky one upped him by proposing a $54.95 speed limit. Yes, the man is just a tad irreverent, but his heart is in the right place, and he honestly wants to serve Texans in an elected office and to make a positive difference in our lives. That should count for something, shouldn't it? Tonight he showed his environmentalist side, when declaring that upon his death, rather than hog up more real estate, he'd like to be cremated, and have his ashes scattered in Rick Perry's hair. Now that brought a tear to my eye.
All kidding aside, Kinky was in town to entertain, not campaign, and for me, it took me back to the 'Dillo in Austin, in '75. He did his country crooner show, showcasing the talents of his lifelong buds, Lil' Jewford on piano and spoken word, and those of Ratzo, his capable guitarist and also old friend and "boy who travels with him". He took the time to read a chapter from his latest book as well, a touching tribute to his father, a WWII veteran, which all in attendance found quite moving and entertaining.

I so enjoyed his show, and was rewarded by a smile and pat on the shoulder from him coming and going to and from the stage, almost as if he recognized me from Austin so many years ago, as a member of his tribe. I have always told those who would listen, that he is a good man, and that he would be a step in the right direction, if elected to any office he aspired to. I hope this is his year.

Just for an example of Kinky's honesty and his earnest desire to represent us in our state government, allow me to share this......As far left as I lean, and as dad liberal/conservative as I am inclined to be, I was accompanied tonight by my sweet young companion of a couple of years now. She is, if categorized, about as conservative a person as you'll ever come across, and after having been dragged to the show by me, and subjected to a couple hours of the Kinkster's charm and bared soul, she declared that regardless of her political affiliations or her right leaning views, that Kinky will get her vote next week, as Agriculture Commissioner. Trust me, that is quite an endorsement coming from her, as she is not easily swayed, or inclined to be frivolous in her decision making. I hope you will see your way clear to vote for him as well.

Give The Masses What They Want........Dirty Laundry

Waking up a day after a major news story in Austin, and some serious dental surgery, I listened intently, as the local morning news gave way to Good Morning America this morning. While hoping for some new information on yesterday's one man war on the IRS, and his effort to start a civil war over taxes, I got a surprise. It seems that in their infinite wisdom and with their finger on the pulse of what "we" want as news, ABC's lead story was a feature on Tiger Woods impending confirmation of his status as a poontang hound, and details on how he plans to hold a press conference announcing his busi.....er personal course correction in life, his return to rehab, and just how he might get back into professional sports (and our wallets).......if we let him, huh?

Our Cu$tomer$ $afety And $atisfaction............

......are our biggest concern. Yeah, right. Yesterday Toyota was scratching their heads, trying to figure out WTF........ today, they claim to have nailed it, and the check is in the mail. Twixt you and be me, if I owned one of the vehicles in question, I'd give some serious second thought to tailgating my fellow drivers who I felt were impeding my getting to my destination, and I would certainly, if living in mountain terrain, consider taking the old Ford truck, rather than the Sequoia to King Soopers or Safeway for that twelve pack..........As with Tylenol, and any monster corporation caught with their pants down, and holding the bag after a major screw-up, they basically will just readjust their game plan and use the fudge factor built into their business model that addresses such unforeseen, but not unexpected anomalies. Almost makes me wish I had a throwdown Camry. That could prove to be a real moneymaker, having seen some of the ambulance chasing law firms' ads on local TV.........., you know, Ikeattorney.com, and the "Christian trial lawyers"........

Drugs: The Cow Versus the Cheetah..........

........not to be confused with the tortoise and the hare. Okay, I am referring to a story in today's paper:
http://www.victoriaadvocate.com/news/2010/jan/27/ab_brief_marijuana_012810_83132/?news
about a pot bust by DPS folks.

There will undoubtedly be some distraught and unhappy Iowans & Minnesotans as a result of this.....

I can't help but think that this senseless prohibition of an herb that is simply grown and smoked and consumed in it's natural state, is a terrible waste of manpower and resources that could be much more effectively utilized in combating serious narcotics and human trafficking. The deal with weed, is that it's so space consuming and easy to find, and considering the fact that probably two in ten vehicles that cross the border and travel north are carrying some, makes it a bird's nest on the ground for DPS and County Mounties looking to make a name for themselves. Reminds me of a funnyjunk.com piece I read not long ago about why people eat beef. It has nothing to do with us being "evolved" or particularly smart(not that I don't enjoy a good steak on occasion). What it's really about with the cows, is that those big fuckers are so easy to catch. We figured that part out long ago. It's simple. People are inherently lazy. Hell, did you ever stop to think that maybe chicken fried cheetah fillets just might taste like chocolate covered heroin? We'll never know though, because those little bastards are so fast.
Well, same with cocaine, heroin, meth, and the money they generate for the cartels. The weed is like catching Angus on the hoof, where the concentrated narcotics are a lot easier to hide and sneak by the revenooers. Take the herb out of the equation, and devote the resources to the dangerous stuff, and you'll make a bigger dent in the bad guys' business.

Food For Thought.........

......could it be that we are all, in our feeding frenzy to nitpick the local paper to death over grammar and spelling, actually pumping up their online hit count and boosting their circulation?????




Naaaah.......

A Breakfast PSA

You Can Dress HIm Up, But You Can't Take Him To Town....

While I think a couple, three of us who recognized BigJ's style, probably didn't do him any favors by ratting him out, ultimately, I am pretty sure it was the obvious grammar gaffes, "Say" instead of "says", a plethora of missing prepositions, and the coup de gras....."shut up!", that got him once again bounced from that Advocate Bar.
As well, his feeding frenzy approach to attacking a number of different posts, coupled with choosing the name "Exile", were probably instrumental in hastening his most recent demise on the Vicad forums in really short order. The shame of it all, is that I think the guy has something to say, and with the right approach and a little coaching and some friendly editing by someone who is qualified, he probably would be a player in the forums. You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink....

I'll See Your Ham, And Raise you a Tweet.......

At the risk of stepping on a few old toes here, I am going to go out on a limb, and say that I finally am starting to see some value in Twitter, and in some of what I once considered to be aggravating social networking websites. Doesn't mean I'll be tweeting tomorrow, or opening a MyFace account, but in the wake of the tragedy in Haiti, I do now see some value in these "instant" communication media, Johnny come lately sites. I have known Ham operators, many of them over the years, and while I admire their technical expertise and dedication, I think that likely now, with the UPS systems in place on cellular communications, and the networks that are in place, that the old tubes and dials are regrettably going the way of the old spout we used to pierce the top of an oil can with, and the oil filter removal tool( for those of us that weren't so cheap that we just drove a screwdriver through the damn thing and twisted it loose the messy way). I reckon it's just progress, and while I am one who usually bitches about software upgrades, invariably, they usually turn out to be better that the last version, and now as I always have, I will likely get with the program sooner or later. That doesn't mean my crotchety old butt won't whine about it for a while first and find some kid to sit them down and tell them about the "good ol' days though...........